PERSONNEL / 001DIRECTOR OF NOT BLINKING
PEARL-51
Has attended 86 briefings. Nobody has seen a blink.
DISGUISE ACTIVEBLINK: PENDING
TRANSMISSION INTERCEPTED / FILE NO. 051
THEY DIDN'T
INVADE.
THEY GOT
APPOINTED.
We spent decades searching the skies.
Turns out, they were collecting government salaries the whole time.
AREA 51 WAS ONBOARDING. WASHINGTON WAS THE PROMOTION.
CLASSIFIEDEXHIBIT A
03 LIFE FORMS IN BUSINESS CASUAL
SCROLL TO DECLASSIFY β THE SIGNAL IS LIVE
01 / THE LEAKACCESS LEVEL: PUBLIC(ISH)
THIS IS NOT A DRILL. (IT'S A MEME.)
THE TRUTH
WAS NEVER
OUT THERE.
It was in the group chat. With a security badge. And an alarming amount of hairspray.
The so-called invasion wasn't a takeover. It was an extremely successful recruitment drive. One day they're hovering over fields. The next they're running press briefings with perfect blowouts and suspiciously excellent dental plans.
FEDΒ·LIΒ·EN/Λfed-lΔ-Ιn/noun
A fictional government employee whose human disguise is performing at approximately 64% capacity.
OFFICIAL EXPLANATIONNOTHING TO SEE
UNOFFICIAL EXPLANATIONEVERYTHING TO MEME
EARTH STATUSPENDING REVIEW
02 / PERSONNEL DATABASE3 RECORDS DECLASSIFIED
MEET YOUR NEW SUPERVISORS
THE THREE
STOOGES OF SPACE.
Three immaculate cover stories. Three deeply questionable Earth impressions. Zero confirmed blinks. All original fictional characters.
PERSONNEL / 001
PERSONNEL / 002CHIEF GRAVITY OFFICER
LONGNECK-3000
Her Earth settings have been buffering since orientation.
DISGUISE ACTIVEGRAVITY: 12%
PERSONNEL / 003HEAD OF HUMAN RESOURCES
AGENT GLITCH
The human firmware keeps restarting mid-conversation.
DISGUISE ACTIVEPATCH: OVERDUE
* All three dossiers are fictional satire. No suggestion is made about anyone depicted in the reference meme.
DEPARTMENT OF EXTRATERRESTRIAL EMPLOYMENT
URGENT MEMORANDUM / CASE 051
AREA 51 WAS
ONBOARDING.
WASHINGTON
WAS THE PROMOTION.
THIS MESSAGE HAS BEEN APPROVED BY ABSOLUTELY NO ONE.β SIGNAL 051
03 / EVENT LOGDOCUMENT INTEGRITY: QUESTIONABLE
A BRIEF HISTORY OF THE COVER-UP
THE OFFICIAL
UNOFFICIAL STORY.
1947 β
THE INTERNS ARRIVE.
A flying saucer lands. Somebody in HR asks for three references and a rΓ©sumΓ©.
AREA 51
CLASSIFIED β
HUMAN TRAINING BEGINS.
Curriculum includes: blinking, small talk, smiling normally, and saying βper my last email.β
EARTH CAMPUS
NOW β
THEY MAKE MIDDLE MANAGEMENT.
The invasion is complete. Somehow everyone still has to submit a timesheet.
WASHINGTON
04 / EXPERIMENTAL EQUIPMENTHIGHLY UNRELIABLE
GOVERNMENT-GRADE* TECHNOLOGY
HUMAN
DISGUISE
SCANNER.
Wondering if you're one of them? Input your codename. The machine will fabricate a completely unscientific assessment.
* By government-grade, we mean this thing was built in a basement.
FEDLIENS_SHELL_V0.51β LIVE
> BOOTING DISGUISE_DETECTOR.EXE...
> ACCESS GRANTED (somehow)
> ENTER SUBJECT CODENAME:
ANALYSING COVER STORY 0%
Checking human firmware...
SUBJECT:
87% ALIEN ENERGY
FOR ENTERTAINMENT ONLY Β· RANDOMISED SATIRE Β· DOES NOT DETECT ANYTHING ABOUT REAL PEOPLE
05 / PROPAGANDA DEPARTMENTREMIX PERMISSION: GRANTED
YOUR ASSIGNMENT, AGENT
SPREAD THE SIGNAL.
Four ready-to-deploy pieces of extremely classified nonsense. Save them. Post them. Remix the whole planet.
06 / TOP SECRET ASSETFOR MEMETIC USE ONLY
THEY CAN'T CLASSIFY THIS ONE
ONE PLANET.
THREE AGENTS.
ZERO CHILL.
The name's FEDLIENS. The mission is spreading fictional government-alien nonsense until every press conference starts looking like a science-fiction audition.
β SOLANA MEME CONCEPTβ³ PURE PARODY ENERGY
ASSET IDENTIFICATION FILEDOC# 051-COIN
$FEDLIENS
TOKEN NAMEFEDLIENS
SYMBOLFEDLIENS
STATUSPRE-LAUNCH
CONTRACTNOT PROVIDED YET
No contract address, token supply, or launch link has been announced here. Beware of impersonators.